Infidelity: Is Monogamy Just a Myth?

The Merits of Matrimony

Brown University professor and psychiatrist Dr. Scott Haltzman said Santagati's message is nonsense. Haltzman is the author of the book "The Secrets of Happily Married Men".

"There's no arguing that having an affair is full of fireworks and excitement and incredible energy. But that fades. That always fades," Haltzman said. "The type of quality you get in a relationship with your wife is something over a period of time that cannot be replaced by any affair or any fling."

And many studies do show that married couples on average, are happier. This year, Brigham Young University professor Julianne Holt-Lunstad found married couples are healthier, too. They have lower blood pressure, less stress.

Some still argue that monogamy isn't natural and that men, especially, are biologically programmed to stray.

"Well, we're programmed to do a lot of things," Haltzman said. "It may be natural if I'm mad at my boss, to want to punch him right in the face. But just because that's a natural thing to do doesn't mean that I'm going to do it."

And although Barash and Lipton concluded that monogamy among animals and people is not natural, they have been married, and faithful to each other for 31 years.

"It has been largely wonderful," Barash said. "The myth would be to say it's always been wonderful. But it certainly hasn't. It's been largely wonderful."

It's been wonderful for Haltzman and his wife as well.

"The benefit of being with one person is that you know that when you're making love to that person, what you have with that one individual is something that you have with no other person," Haltzman said.