Ledger's Will Dilemma Reflects Wider Issue

"Death is not a pleasant subject to talk about," Gravett said. "People don't like to talk about it and they certainly don't like to think about it. There's a little bit of an emotional, psychological element to it."

Deciding guardianship of one's children can also delay the process, especially if the parents are divorced.

"It can become a thorny issue," Gravett said. "There may be problematic family dynamics. One spouse may not like their in-laws all that much."

Gravett said that in choosing a guardian, it's important for parents to select someone who they believe share their philosophy of child-rearing and would also be able to manage any financial assets the children inherit.

Wells said that it's a complicated choice to make.

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"It forces you really to look at your family members and your friends differently than you do at your Sunday picnic," he said.

And then there's the not-so-little matter of money. Alan Rothschild, division vice chair in the American Bar Association Real Property Trust and Estate Section, estimated that preparing the most basic will may cost between $500 to $1,500. But Rothschild said that most people need more complex wills, which cost more.

"I think sometimes when people focus on the initial cost of estate planning, it deters them from doing it," he said. "But for people who have experienced a family situation where they have seen how expensive and time-consuming and disruptive it can be to a family to not have a well-drawn will … those folks are convinced that the initial upfront cost of the document is well worth it."

There's also the issue of retirement savings. Many don't realize that, whether they have a will or not, they must provide names of beneficiaries to the administrators of their IRAs, 401(k)s and pension plans.

"It's not enough to say in your will 'my spouse will be entitled to half my retirement or all of my retirement as a death benefit.' You have to actually go to your plan," Gravett said.

'Desperately Broken'

Neely wrote in her blog, www.familywealthmatters.com, that cases like Ledger's and Smith's show that "the current model for providing legal services in the United States is desperately broken!"

"Even wealthy celebrities are victim of the current mindset that estate planning is about form documents that can be prepared once and never looked at again. As these cases highlight, that's incorrect," she wrote.

Through her blog and personalfamilylawyer.com, Neely advocates for a personal approach to legal services and for consumers to choose lawyers with whom they can have an ongoing relationship.

Neely has personal experience with the pratfalls of impersonal estate planning. Her father-in-law, she said, spent thousands establishing a trust for his family. When he died, Neely and her husband were shocked to learn that his assets were never formally transferred into the trust.