Wolf Files: Top Weird Stories of 2003

While lethal, a tiger's bite could be no worse than having to change its litter box — especially when the alligator starts to complain. [Next: Extraterrestrial Lobbyists] 4. Extraterrestrial Lobbyists: Just like everyone else, alien abductees now have a special interest group fighting for their rights in Washington.

In the years to come, lawmakers will need to be informed on extraterrestrial issues, says Michael Salla, a political science professor who founded exopolitics.org.

If a flying saucer crash-lands, who owns it? What will be done with the technology? Who will protect the whistle-blowers if the government is withholding evidence of a close encounter?

"So many people have stepped forward," says Salla, who has taught at American University. "They deserve some protection. There's so much at stake." [Next: J.Lo and Ben]

5. Bad Luck for Bennifer: J.Lo and Ben's on-again, off-again wedding plans proved once again that a lot of Hollywood love stories are significantly worse than Gigli.

But the couple better known as "Bennifer" should take heart: no matter what the future holds for them, they could never be considered the worst celebrity couple ever.

Who would that be? Drew Barrymore and Tom Green? Lisa Marie Presley and Nicholas Cage? Julia Roberts and Lyle Lovett? Robin Givens and Mike Tyson?

Who could forget Carmen Electra and Dennis Rodman? The Baywatch babe and the rainbow-haired basketball star tied the knot in 1999 to cap off a night of heavy drinking in Las Vegas. Rodman sought an annulment 10 days later, claiming he didn't even remember the ceremony.

At least that union outlasted the 8-day marriage of Dennis Hopper and Michelle Phillips.

And you can't have this conversation without mentioning Joan Collins and Elizabeth Taylor, who have been married a combined 13 times (if you count Richard Burton twice) and Ernest Borgnine and Ethel Merman, two of the loudest people in Hollywood history, who stayed married for a whole month in 1964. [Next: Dating Science]

6. The Weird Science of Dating: Thanks to the increasingly high-tech world of dating, we now know for certain what many people always assumed — blondes have more fun.

Blondes on Internet dating service Match.com get 14 gentlemen e-mailers while redheads averaged 11 and brunettes got a measly nine.

In 2003, dating became increasingly high-tech, as the world welcomed cell phone dating services — a romantic way to find a lover while shopping for groceries or waiting for a bus.

How do you find true love? Pick up your phone, punch in the age, hair color, body type and special interests of the person you are seeking.

It might sound like any other dating service, but here's the difference: The cell phone matchmaker has the technology to locate where you're calling from and provide a list of potential matches. The girl of your dreams might be sitting in the bar with you, calling the same cellular dating service.

And even if your cell phone can't find you a true love, you can count on it to deliver the next best thing — pizza. [Next: Nude Holiday Options] 7. Naked Holiday Options: Anything you can do, I can do naked — thanks to the fast-growing nudist recreation industry, which is allowing folks to play tennis, Jet Ski, and golf in the raw.

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