Are Men Getting Smaller Where It Counts?

"It's absolutely important that we have the best information to make the best-fitting condom," said Carol Carrozza, Lifestyle's vice president of marketing. "If a condom is too tight, it constricts circulation. It's uncomfortable, and it reduces sensitivity. If it's too loose, that's dangerous."

Carrozza says the circumference of the penis — otherwise referred to as girth — is often more important than length when new condom sizes are considered. "Because of the way condoms unroll, it's really not the case that they are not long enough."

According to the study, the average erect penis had a girth of 4.972 inches. About 75 percent of men were between 4.5 and 5.5 inches.

"We already have a larger condom," says Carrozza. "What our research shows is that 17 percent of erections measured under 4.5 inches, and there might be a market for that."

Of course, once again, the frail male ego comes into play, and while condoms come in large, studded, ribbed and flavored varieties, you don't see small or petite or narrow models. We'll just have to see what kind of circumlocution the marketing folks come up with.

The Weird News Roundup

Wrong Number

For six years, pregnant women in Pennsylvania were offered a "mind-blowing sexual experience" when they called a state guide listing for advice about abortion and adoption. It seems the guide had transposed two digits in the telephone number and was funnelling folks to a sex line. Why did it go on so many years? "We didn't know about it," said a state health official, who wished to remain anonymous. "People didn't call up to complain." The voice on the recording says: "Yeah baby, you've reached the right place. If this is your first time, don't be shy … If you are under 18 or do not wish to be billed just $2.99 to $4.99 a minute hang up now."

The man who gave us Goodfellas is trying to make a little more money off the mob. Henry Hill, whose life was chronicled in the gangster classic, has launched a Web site hawking autographed posters and other memorabilia. Hill, who turned against fellow mobsters in court, was booted from the federal government's Witness Protection Program in 1987, after being convicted of burglary, assault and drunken driving. Now, he says, he needs revenue from his Web site to pay the rent. A personally autographed Goodfellas script goes for $59.95. He says, "Get yours before I get whacked."

Peanut Waste Munchies

You love potato chips. But what about peanut chips? Researchers from the University of Georgia think they've stumbled on the next snack food frontier: peanut chips. Perhaps you don't want to think about cramming compressed peanut waste into your gut. But developers say it's a high-protein, low-fat alternative to traditional Ruffles. Plus there's also an environmental angle: You see, they've got to find a place for all the peanut waste after processors press nuts for peanut oil. So feel good about yourself. You're not a chip-munching human garbage can. You're saving precious landfill space. You might be fat. But you're munching for Mother Nature.

Buck Wolf is a producer at The Wolf Files is a weekly feature. If you want to receive weekly notice when a new column is published, join the e-mail list.

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