South Parkers Portray Bush Twins as Sex Kittens

December 22 -- When President-elect George W. Bush takes office next year, he'll have a less than pleasant welcome from South Park creators Trey Parker and Matt Stone.

The gutter-minded duo is creating a new show for Comedy Central tentatively called Family First, and it's said to cast George Dubya's twin daughters as sex-hungry lesbians. The live-action show apparently contains plenty of Stone and Parker's raunchy humor — all aimed at 19-year-old Bush sisters Jenna and Barbara.

According to Web site Ain't It Cool News, which obtained a copy of an audition script, the characters based on the fraternal twins nuzzle, suck, and coo at one another in a borderline incestuous romp. In one scene, Jenna attempts to taste a candy cane conveniently placed in Barbara's lap, causing the former to exclaim, "It's so big, I can hardly get it in my mouth!"

The script then calls for Vice President-elect Dick Cheney's caricature to enter the room; when he does, Jenna — still orally fixated on the candy cane — asks, "You want a suck, Dick?"

Oh dear. And we thought Mr. Hankey the Christmas Poo was pushing the old "eww" envelope!

Comedy Central spokesman Tony Fox says there is no overt lesbianism involved, and that the dialogue quoted comes from a sample script. He also told the New York Post's Page Six that "there are plans to include the twin Bush daughters in the show. They will be very hot and sexy, [but] the use of their names is where reality ends."

Parker, however, has claimed that his new show will be "barely legal. We're going to [mess] with reality."

That's one more reason for Vice President Al Gore to thank his lucky stars he didn't win the election; had he been chosen as the new president of the United States, it would have been his daughters targeted by the South Park daredevils.

Family First is set to air in mid-March.