'Deal Breakers': How to Heal a Relationship
Bethany Marshall advises when to keep things going and when to call it quits.
June 6, 2007 — -- In her new book, "Deal Breakers," psychoanalyst Bethany Marshall outlines how men and women should decide when to continue working on a relationship and when to call it quits.
Marshall suggests setting boundaries -- or deal breakers -- to achieve the happiness that every person deserves. She appeared on "Good Morning America" with tips on how to save a marriage.
Every relationship has an "original agreement," whether emotional, sexual or financial. Some are a combination of all three. You know you've come to a dead end in your relationship when your original agreement isn't being fulfilled. If the original agreement isn't being met, you have a deal breaker.
When you define your breaking point, it's a guide to getting things back on track and you have to get back to that original agreement.
It's all about getting off the merry-go-round and getting on track to a fulfilling relationship. The following are all deal breakers.
If you're unhappy with the other person, you have to define the problem, set a time limit and allow the other person to reach for solutions. She has to step back to see if he does reach for it, instead of nagging.
The assignment for both of you becomes: Find out what it is that makes you happy and decide how you can bring that home. For every problem there is a solution. You can't just live for the promise of a future where things magically get better.
