Worst Love Songs of All Time

You're the meaning in my life
You're the inspiration
You bring feeling to my life
You're the inspiration
Wanna have you near me
I wanna have you hear me sayin'
No one needs you more than I need you

Peter Cetera still owes fans and music lovers an apology for this cavity-inducing Top 40 hit.

Whitesnake: 'Is This Love'

If you have to question it, then it's probably not love. It could be lust, heartburn or even a heart attack. Either way, it's not something your sweetie thinks you should be pondering on a lovers' holiday.

Is this love that I'm feeling
Is this the love that I've been searching for
Is this love or am I dreaming
This must be love
Cos it's really got a hold on me

A hold on me

Whitesnake didn't even begin to ponder this question until it already let the girl go. David Coverdale and John Sykes, who wrote the song, are probably just lonely.

N'Sync: 'God Must Have Spent a Little More Time on You'

Odds are you probably shouldn't rely on a love song by any boy band. So, if "God Must Have Spent a Little More Time on You" is on the playlist you're about to give, you should dump it.

Your love is like a river
Peaceful and deep
Your soul is like a secret
That I never could keep
When I look into your eyes
I know that it's true
God must have spent
A little more time
On you
(A little more time, yes he did baby)

This pre-fab, manufactured pop hit is so lame because it's anemic. Carl Sturken's and Evan Rogers' lyrics just don't ring true because N'Sync doesn't seriously sell them. They're too simple. Simple sometimes works, but in this case, the uncomplicated rendition falls flat.

Bonus Tracks

Dan Hill: 'Sometimes When We Touch'

If the full beard and mustache don't give it away, then you're already in trouble. This commitment-phobe wants to love you and does, but it's just too much. There's too much love. I'm drowning. Translation: He or she is just not that into you.

And sometimes when we touch
The honesty's too much
And I have to close my eyes and hide
I wanna hold you till I die
Till we both break down and cry
I wanna hold you till the fear in me subsides

Hill, who wrote the song, may be in need of a serious therapist and has booked you for the job. Whose idea of a romantic date is sitting around talking about how they should, but can't be a couple while crying? Answer: the lonely person without a date on Valentine's.

Pity party table for one, please.

Billy Ocean: 'Get Outta of My Dreams, Get Into My Car'

This list already has demonstrated why vehicular and feminine comparisons are so bad. But long before R. Kelly could rev his engine, singer Billy Ocean was burning rubber up the charts with his hit song, "Get Outta My Dreams, Get Into My Car."

Besides comparing you to an inanimate object that gets replaced — excuse me — upgraded every five to 10 years, songwriters Ocean and Mutt Lange found it imperative to imply all the dirty things they want to do with you in a car.

Get outta my dreams
Get in to my car
Get outta my dream
Get in to the back seat baby
Get in to my car
Beep beep, yeah
Get outta my mind
Get in to my life
Oh I said hey (Hey) you (You)
Get in to my car

Nothing says, "Be mine," quite like making out in the back seat of a Camino. Nice. Once you add his obsessive nature — he's dreaming about you all the time — to the song's bubble-gum like pop beat, the combination is too much for any love bird. The fowl just may drown in the ocean.

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