Does 'Revenge Cheating' Work?

"Pretty much not much net positive can occur," said Everett L. Worthington Jr., professor of psychology at Virginia Commonwealth University, and author of the book "Dimensions of Forgiveness: Psychological Research & Theological Perspectives."

"Basically, if my spouse hurts me and I hurt the spouse back in the same way, it tells the spouse, 'Your indiscretions will be met in kind,'" Worthington said. "That can make the spouses more careful not to tread on each other's toes. While that might seem positive, it is only positive in a limited sense."

Mending the Rift

Despite the fact that they may not be the best remedy for a damaged relationship, the pain and betrayal that goes along with being cheated on often makes retaliatory infidelity an attractive prospect.

But psychological experts say a more long-term approach, based on forgiveness, is the best bet for preserving the relationship.

"It takes coming clean completely with what has happened — no more secrets; taking full responsibility for one's affair — no blaming the partner; and a firm agreement on fidelity in the future," Doherty said.

"Many couples also need marital therapy to work through the grief and anger and to learn how to use this as a way to renew the relationship. Lots of couples recover."

Judging from their public confrontation of their past relationship problems, Olds said it appears that the Patersons may have come to this crucial reckoning.

"They seem to be saying, 'We each did it, we each made mistakes, and now we're moving on,'" she said.