Tuesday Morning Quaterback: It Doesn't Pay To Punt

Assigning loads of work is a great CYA tactic against complaints about standards. More important, teachers know that too much homework renders home life unhappy during the evening when exhausted moms and dads are trying to relax. In those glistening suburban houses with the flat-panel TVs and faux-granite countertops, kids are crying about too much homework and parents are stressed about too much homework -- take that, helicopter parents! Plus teachers know that many moms and dads not only help kids with their homework, but end up doing the homework. Assigning extra homework makes affluent parents miserable, exacting the public teachers' vengeance.

Forget Pro Wrestling, Give Me the Babes of Norwegian Curling: Curling has always struck TMQ as a sedentary activity for senior citizens or Canadians, and there may be only a technical difference between those categories. Reader J. K. Hoversholm of Bergen, Norway, reports that Norwegian curling matches have begun to feature scantily clad, tall, blonde curling babes who rival the recent U.S. Open ballgirls. Here, in Norwegian, is an advert for a curling-babe pinup calendar. Proceeds go to charity!

Buck-Buck-Brawckkkkkkk: Jacksonville trailed Indianapolis 14-7 at the end of the third quarter, and faced fourth-and-1 on the Colts' 31. Jack Del Rio sent out the place-kicker for a 48-yard attempt. But Josh Scobee had already missed from 24, and Scobee is not a distance kicker, going into the game having hit only 11-of-19 from the 40 to 49. Plus in this circumstance, if Jax goes for the first down and misses, the Colts get the ball on the 31 or so; a field goal miss gives the ball to Indianapolis on the 38. The kick failed, and TMQ wrote the words "game over" in his notebook.

Miss Rogue, Your CT Scan Is Back. Would You Have Any Idea What This Internal Organ Is? I want to know what kind of vitamins Magneto takes! They must be good vitamins because his powers increase movie-by-movie. In the first "X-Men" flick, Magneto could control ferrous metals within about 100 feet. Captured at the movie's end, he was imprisoned in a plastic cell reached by a 100-foot plastic bridge; the guards in the watch-room beyond the bridge were using metal, but Magneto's powers did not reach that far. In the second X flick, Magneto was able to snatch the crippled, plummeting X Jet out of the air and save it; the plane started decelerating hundreds of feet above the ground, indicating Magneto has increased his range. In the third movie, this summer's "The Last Stand," Magneto was able to levitate the entire 4,200-foot main span of the Golden Gate Bridge. Set aside what the main span of the Golden Gate Bridge must weigh -- it's nearly a mile long, meaning Magneto can project his power a much greater distance than previously. You can check the Golden Gate Bridge's live webcam to see if any mutant armies are crossing.

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