Leno: "Now, some politicians now want to close Guantanamo Bay. They want to get rid of our interrogators. You know, why can't we do with this like we do with other jobs in the country -- outsource them to India? You want to torture people, put them on that computer tech support line in New Delhi for a half hour. That'll do it. That works."
The Daily Show with Jon Stewart:
Stewart: "So you know what might turn the tide here? Show the American people that we have evidence on these detainees that the rule of law is still in effect, that the war on terror doesn't exist in some moral netherworld. Or cheap theatrics might also do. You cannot be serious. Yes, Duncan Hunter showed the clearest evidence that exonerates the United States from all wrongdoing."
Rep. Duncan Hunter, R-Calif. [on tape]: "It has rice. It has pita bread. And it has two types of fruit -- double vegetables and two types of fruit. Two types of fruit. Two types of fruit."
Stewart: "We are blameless. We have given them two types of fruit."