Get Gone: 7 Getaways Inspired by 'Gone Girl'

— -- intro: [SPOILER ALERT: The following article makes some rather pointed insinuations about the film's plot.]

If you’re anything like us, you breathlessly awaited the premier of "Gone Girl," the dark psychological thriller based on Gillian Flynn’s best-selling book. Starring Ben Affleck and Rosamund Pike as that oh-so-charming couple, Nick and Amy, it hit theaters earlier this month. And just in case you’ve been living under a rock (we prefer luxury hotels, ourselves, but no judgment), the book (and movie) begin on the day that Amy has mysteriously disappeared. We’re not going to tell you what happened to her (she MAY have been murdered, or she MAY have been shacking up at a motel in the Ozarks as part of an elaborate ruse to frame her husband). But for argument’s sake, let’s just say she was shacking up — and that she encountered some unsavory fellow hotel guests who robbed her. We personally think Amy (hypothetically, of course!) could have done a whole lot better in her hotel choice. If only she’d known about Oyster! Because we could have helped her out…but better late than never. So, travelers and unhappy spouses of the world, we bring you seven hotels that we think are smart places to hide out — next time you want to get gone.

quicklist: 1title: 3 Peaks Resort and Beach Club, Lake Tahoetext: We think Amy would approve of this resort, which shares some elements with another cabin-style property she may have chosen. Its 62 rooms have cozy lodge style (think: pine furniture, stone fireplaces), prices are low, and some of the suites have kitchens — perfect for longer-term stays. Best of all, rooms have safes — just in case you have a money belt of cash to store and don’t want it falling into the hands of pesky neighbors.media: 26103949

quicklist: 2title: Home2 Suites by Hilton Nashville Vanderbilttext: Many people hiding out choose to cross state lines to do so, and this extended stay hotel is located in Tennessee, which shares a little bit of border with Missouri (where Amy was living). Its clean, colorful rooms have functional kitchenettes, and big 42-inch cable TVs (helpful for monitoring press coverage about your disappearance.)media: 26103603

quicklist: 3title: The Lodge at Torrey Pines, La Jollatext: So the prices at this luxury resort aren’t really in the budget for someone indefinitely on the run, but the rooms are definitely more in line with the style of living Amy enjoys. Gorgeous, craftsman-style decor and rooms with a woodsy feel make this a more luxurious version of the Hide-A-Way Cabins (where Amy may have stayed) in the book. Even better, guests get priority tee times at the Torrey Pines Golf Course — which is where Scott Peterson, who some say was the real-live inspiration for the story, was arrested by police with around $15,000 in cash on his person. OH WAIT. Maybe skip this one.media: 26103515

quicklist: 4title: The Plaza, New York Citytext: Amy is a true-blue New Yorker who grew up rich, so we think she’d be pretty comfortable at one of the city’s top luxury hotels. Even better, Amy — who inspired the children’s series Amazing Amy, written by her parents — may enjoy staying at the hotel that was the home of another children’s book character, Eloise. The prices may be steep, but the staff here — used to shielding celebrities — are famously discreet. And the spa has a top-notch hair salon, helpful for creating disguises.media: 26103417

quicklist: 5title: The Sassy Moose Inn, Wyomingtext: Like the Hide-A-Way Cabins, the Sassy Moose Inn is also an isolated mountain getaway. But unlike the Hide-A-Way Cabins, there are only five rooms and no pool, making it a whole lot easier to avoid fellow guests. Rooms for the most part have homey log cabin style, and the property is surrounded by nature.media: 26103250

quicklist: 6title: Blackberry Farm, Tennesseetext: This gorgeous luxury property offers unparalleled privacy — it’s on 4,200 acres of land surrounded by the beauty of the Appalachians. The charming cottages are spread out across the farm (again, no need to talk to the neighbors!) and may include fireplaces, whirlpool tubs and kitchens. Cooking is optional, though, as amazing farm-to-table cuisine is included in the all-inclusive rates. This may have helped Amy with the extra weight she (maybe!) chose to gain to change her appearance.media: 26103900

quicklist: 7title: Winvian, Connecticuttext: This romantic, upscale property is set on 113 acres of countryside and has only 19 cottages — making for plenty of privacy and seclusion. Sure, it’s not cheap, but on the upside, the sort of characters who might rob you and blow your cover probably can’t afford to stay here. All of the sophisticated, individually decorated cottages have working fireplaces, and if the stress of being on the run starts to get to you, there are also jetted tubs and in-room massages available.media: 26103005