Online Showoffs: Exceptions to the Rule

PHOTO: Always show off your puppy. Always.

For a few weeks now, we've been gently guiding you through the process of resisting the urge to post all your embarrassing and annoying musings and activities all over the web. But there are certainly moments that lend themselves to being shared with as many of your former elementary school classmates as possible.

Here, then, are some things that should DEFINITELY be shown off online.

PHOTO: It is imperative that you follow Manny the Frenchie on Instagram.

Did you buy a puppy? Did your dog have puppies? Did you see a puppy? Are you considering undergoing surgery so as to better resemble a puppy? Share all of these moments except the last one. That sort of thing is better left for TV, not the internet.

PHOTO: *Homer Simpson gurgle*

A lot of people have mixed feelings about this one, but that's only because dummies online tend to take this to extremes. Like, we know what a chicken nugget looks like without needing your Instagram to see it all lit and posed like it's laying about in an English country garden. But when you have a nice, thick, juicy slab of kale salad, like...I kind of want to see it? I want to see your BBQ and your lobster rolls and your hot bowls of ramen and your tacos al pastor, especially if you tell me where I can get all these things, too. Never underestimate porn for gluttons, especially if it involves melted cheese or chocolate.

PHOTO: It's just... just so beautiful.
Especially Cake

It's just so pretty.

PHOTO: Like mother, like daughter.
That Thing Your Mom Said

Our families also say terrible and/or hilarious things. I kind of want to know about them. Don't hoard all the awkwardness and family drama at Thanksgiving. Share it, so we can laugh through the pain together.

PHOTO: Duh, I wanna see the funny stuff my friends make.
Your Wonderfulness

Did you do something amazing? Are we in agreement that paying for an expensive photo shoot for your child or cultivating the perfect faux-casual pout or looking off to the side are not examples of amazing somethings? Then, by all means, let the people know what you've accomplished. Share that painting you spent so much time creating. Upload that performance you gave with your band. If you're really proud of something you made or did, share it. After all, a huge part of social media is that it keeps us connecting to the people who actually care about us and our accomplishments.

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