Co-written with her manager, Lindsay Rielly, the book retells hilarious and heartbreaking dating stories, including the time when Smirnoff was in a date’s car and they’d pulled up to their dinner destination.
“And I decided to be, you know, aware of the fact that I didn't want to hit the door on the curb. So I decided to stick my head out of the window to make sure how far from the curb I was,” she said, laughing. “And naturally, he wasn't looking. He was being cool. And he just rolls up the window. So at this point, yes, my head is dangling outside of the car.”
She describes the mishap as “the ice-breaker, because, like, at that point for the rest of the date, we couldn't look at each other without cracking up. So, like, the whole date was pretty much laughing out loud.”
In another story told in the book, Smirnoff, 37, tells the story of a friend whose date went so badly she escaped out of the bathroom window of the restaurant, and another whose date kept asking to wear his date’s dress.
Rycroft asked Smirnoff about the thinking behind the book’s title.
“You know, in the breakup and sometimes you hear, ‘It's not you. It's me.’ And in reality, you know that they mean that it is you. So we decided to say, ‘Well, don't worry. We're not that into you, too,’” she said.
The idea behind the book was to share others’ dating experiences to show that everyone has dating horror stories to tell.
“Well, we all go on dates, right? We all go on dates whether you're in a relationship, whether you are looking for Mr. Right. And a lot of times when you're in the moment and something happens, you kind of sit back and go, like, ‘How did I get myself into it?’” Smirnoff said.
Although dating is hard, people need to be able to laugh at themselves and keep going, Smirnoff said.
“You have to look at everything from a positive side, and kind of learn from it, and move forward. So after a while, after talking on the phone and coming up with all these, you know, funny dates, we decided to put everything into the book,” she said.
The book also includes some advice, including that women should trust their intuition.
“A lot of times women go against their intuition. Like, we feel something. We see the red flags. But we are always so hopeful, you know, that we can be the ones,” she said.
Although Smirnoff kept mum about her current love life, she says she has had her fair share of romance, including with A-list celebrities. The book doesn’t name any names, though, she said, adding that the bad experiences have been valuable.
“Just enjoy it. Enjoy and learn how to laugh at the situation and at yourself. Because if you can't laugh at yourself, it becomes a sad, sad dating experience. And we all have those disastrous dates,” she said. “And we all talk to our girlfriends over the phone or over a couple of cocktails. So we all have that experience. And this is the book where we all laugh at ourselves pretty much.”
"We’re Just Not That Into You: Dating Disasters From the Trenches” was released Tuesday. On that day, Smirnoff announced in an Instagram post she would not be returning for season 20 of “Dancing With the Stars,” which premieres March 16 on ABC.