-- On Thursday night's "Jimmy Kimmel Live!" Kimmel welcomed Johnny Depp and debriefed him about the recent, very public flap with Australia's Minister of Agriculture over the "smuggling" of the actor's two teacup Yorkshire terriers into the country.
The politician, Barnaby Joyce, publicly scolded Depp and his wife Amber Heard for breaking the country's quarantine laws by allegedly failing to declare their Yorkshire terriers, Boo and Pistol, at customs when they arrived by private jet.
At the time, Joyce demanded that the dogs leave the country or risk being euthanized. He told the Australian TV show "The Project" that Depp has to "abide by the laws of the nation," and that being named People's "Sexiest Man Alive twice" didn't allow him any extra dispensation.
"What kind of a maniac is this?" Kimmel asked, after playing a clip from the minister.
"Maybe he's just doing his job," Depp demurred.
"No, that is one of the craziest things I think I've heard," the late night host insisted.
The actor countered, "This sort of weird, sweaty ... gut man ... decided that ... two five-, six-inch teacup Yorkshire terriers would harm the country in some way," before adding sarcastically: "He has a point. Especially when you consider Australia has the most poisonous creatures on Earth."
Depp got more serious when Kimmel mentioned that Joyce threatened to throw Heard in jail over the fiasco. "If they did that, I'd just fly to Australia to assault that man, so that I could go to jail [instead]."
"Yeah right!" Kimmel responded. "Jack Sparrow's not gonna stand by and let this happen."
Depp can be seen in theaters next playing gangster Whitey Bulger in "Black Mass."
"Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Men Tell No Tales" doesn't arrive until July 7, 2017.