Much consternation surrounding Chambers Bay

— -- UNIVERSITY PLACE, Wash. -- Here at the U.S. Vegetable Open, Henrik Stenson says the greens at Chambers Bay are "like putting on broccoli."

No, no, no, says Rory McIlroy. "I think they're more like cauliflower."

Whatever they are, U.S. Open greens aren't supposed to be compared to food groups. Or to the lunar surface (more Stenson). Or to a dust surface ( Charl Schwartzel). Or to the deceased ( Ernie Els, who says four of the greens are dead).