Can Racial Sensitivity Go Too Far?

March 13 -- If a white woman with long hair flips her hair back in the presence of a black woman, might her actions be racially charged, or interpreted that way?

Perhaps, suggests author Lena Williams. Williams says because the media ideal is long, straight hair, a white woman may be insulting — even if she's not aware of it — a black woman, whose hair, she says, may be coarse or nappy.

Current census reports tell us the United States is more diverse than ever, so one might think in the new millennium we have figured out how to socialize with people of different races. But according to Williams, author of The Little Things: The Everyday Interactions That Get Under the Skin of Blacks and Whites, it's these kinds of gestures that keep racial tension alive and well. Read an excerpt.

"They're not the big issues. It's everyday interactions," says Williams, a New York Times reporter. "Things that we are doing that may be … aggressive, may be irritating, may be misinterpreted."

Locking Doors and Getting Too Personal

For example, when driving on the highway and passing others, says Ron Green, who is black, "I'll often see people reach over and … lock the car door." Green's interpretation is that his race is the catalyst for fear.

Green says he's also offended when a white person asks, "What's the latest dance?"

Another African-American man, Ronald Wyche, says he's insulted when whites ask his opinion of Nation of Islam leader Louis Farrakhan."They say, 'What about Farrakhan? Are you going to condemn him?'" He says he responds, "Why do I have to condemn him? Do you have to condemn [conservative televangelist Jerry] Falwell?"

Dr. Alvin Poussaint, a black Harvard psychiatrist, feels some whites get personal with black people too quickly.

"When a policeman calls me Alvin, I recoil. Because I know that tradition in the South and around the country was not to address black people as Mr., Mrs. or Miss … I find it disrespectful," he says.