Our winning strategy for dealing with conflict comes from Ken S. in Mala, Sweden.:
"I have used this in situations with very senior people with gigantic egos and it works great. If you can stroke their egos first, they will talk with you like you are best friends. At first it feels like you are putting yourself in a subordinate position or a position of weakness, but once you do this a few times, you'll come out of the process feeling a sense of accomplishment, plus a feeling that you have put yourself in a position of relative power for the next conflict. When I look at the leaders that I have a lot of respect for, they do this sort of thing with apparent ease. It doesn't mean that they put themselves in a position of losing respect or not being respected. It means they know how to choose their battles and how to balance repsect with accomplishment and progress. Who do you respect more? The guy who gets things done or the guy that is always fighting the good or not so good fight?"
Bob Rosner is a best-selling author, speaker and internationally syndicated columnist. His newest best seller, "GRAY MATTERS: The Workplace Survival Guide" (Wiley, 2004), is a business comic book that trades cynicism for solutions. Ask Bob a question: firstname.lastname@example.org or http://graymattersbook.com.
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This work is the opinion of the columnist and in no way reflects the opinion of ABC News.