The Six Worst Airplane Passengers of 2009

We've all heard about (and sometimes seen for ourselves) the ugly side of the airlines.

I'm talking about Surly Sue, the flight attendant with the fake smile, the snippy manner and the "don't even think about asking for another pack of peanuts" glare. Or how about the Clueless Customer Service Guy, who has no idea when the next available flight is, and clearly doesn't care.

But you know what? Some of those unpleasant airline employees (and there aren't many, believe me) are complete and utter delights when you compare them to some of the customers.

The ones I call nightmare passengers -- the people who torment the flight crews and leave the rest of us begging for mercy. Yes, their numbers are tiny, too. But not tiny enough.

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In case you haven't been keeping up, here's my short list of Worst Passengers of 2009:

"Liquid Soap Lady": A woman on a United flight allegedly took pills and alcohol, then tried to bite a crew member's leg. She also reportedly drank down the contents of a lavatory's liquid soap dispenser (apparently for its alcohol content). Her explanation to the cops: "I sometimes do crazy things."

"I-Have-a-Bomb Guy": A passenger on a Delta flight reportedly knocked a crew member to the floor as he attempted to open an exit door while yelling, "I have a bomb!" Passengers piled on, and he was subdued (keep reading for the postscript).

"Drinking Buddy": According to reports, flight attendants on a small Comair jet cut off the booze to a hefty and clearly intoxicated passenger, so he started swinging. The incident took place before 10 in the morning, and the loaded lad was reportedly on his way to his grandmother's funeral.