Charlie Sheen's Top 5 Tales

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Later, The Boston Globe called the performance a "dreary debacle, while a Boston Herald columnist likened Sheen's show to "a pathetic little party."

1. 'Two and a Half Men' Wants Me Back. Lately, a large part of Sheen's shtick has been talking about how the show that fired him is trying to woo him back. Last week, Sheen said there's an "85-percent" chance he'll end up on "Two and a Half Men" again.

But according to the studio behind the show, nothing could be further from the truth. In a letter obtained by TMZ.com last week, lawyers for Warner Bros. called Sheen's claims "false." They went on: "As you know, there have been no discussions, there are no discussions and there will be no discussions, regarding his returning to or having any involvement with the series." It doesn't sound like this prophecy of Sheen's is coming true anytime soon.

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