Fa la la la la, they're Oprah's favorite things.
So sang Oprah Winfrey as the legendary talk-show host jubilantly introduced Part 1 of her annual "Oprah's Ultimate Favorite Things" episode, during which she gives audience members thousands of dollars worth of her most beloved items.
Amid the diamonds, cashmere and cameras, audience members -- who had thought they were attending an episode about meditation -- sobbed, screamed and squealed as Winfrey revealed that they'd all be going on an all-expenses paid Caribbean cruise.
A holiday box was wheeled on stage and, as Winfrey opened it, an enormous inflatable cruise ship emerged as the audience erupted.
The seven-day cruise came after more than 20 items, including a Nikon camera priced at nearly $700 and a Philip Stein watch studded with no less than 58 diamonds.
"It's a diamond watch," Winfrey screamed.
The audience also received a tote bag and shoe combo by high-end designer Tory Burch and a cashmere sweater and throw designed by Ralph Lauren with input, of course, from Winfrey herself.
"It's flattering on absolutely everybody," said Oprah, whose name is also included on the tag. "This color makes me think of a golden sandy beach and my dog, Sadie."
Winfrey noted that "medics were standing by" in case audience members collapsed from the excitement as she doled out $525 Judith Ripka Eclipse Earrings and a hair treatment system by the host's stylist, Andre Walker, priced at $65.
"He's finally bottled the magic," Winfrey said of Walker.
A set of 18 candles -- a different scene for each room in your home -- were also gifted, as Winfrey screamed, "It's a candle palooza."
"Bring out the candles, bring out the cashmere, bring out the hair things, bring out the earrings for all," she said, as employees from Fedex, dubbed the "Fedex Elves," helped to distribute the loot.
A self-proclaimed foodie, Winfrey gifted a Breville Panini Press from William Sonoma -- priced at $99.95 -- that comes with a recipe card for what else but Winfrey's "Love Sandwich."
A Kyocera Ceramic Knife set, which Winfrey said she once received from "a famous chef," was also among the gifts, as were containers of her favorite frozen macaroni and cheese dish, "Beecher's World Best Mac & Cheese."
Explaining how she loves "the edges" of treats such as brownies, Winfrey gave out Baker's Edge Lasagna and Brownie Pan -- with a Ghirardelli brownie pix -- crying out, "Now every brownie has an edge."
For those who might feel guilty after indulging in the sweet treats, Winfrey gave out a book titled, "A Course in Weight Loss," which includes 21 spiritual lessons for surrendering your weigh forever. Also added to audience members' bookshelves: Jay-Z's new book "Decoded."
Those in the audience less interested in reading will be pleased with their new five-year Netflix membership and, of course, the brand new TV on which to watch those movies.
Putting on her own pair of 3-D glasses, Winfrey presented the audience with a BRAVIA flatscreen 3-D television, Blu-Ray player and even more movies priced at $3,600.
As audience members dabbed away tears and stood in shock, Winfrey announced new closet systems for all.