If Super-Waif Kate Moss Has a Baby, What’s Next? Bum Fighting?

And whatever unhealthy practices models may have used to maintain their appearances pre-kiddie, after the baby, all bets are off.

You can't breast-feed if you don't feed yourself. You shouldn't breast-feed and take diet supplements, amphetamines, cocaine or any other of the many "body stabilizers" the supermodel sect has been known to partake in. There are no four-hour workouts because children require 24-hour attention. Nannies help, but they aren't mommies.

Cindy Crawford is the exception to the rule.

I personally would find it a welcome relief to see Kate Moss step onto a runway with 10 extra pounds, a great-looking fitted dress, and a baby carriage. Who needs to see her yet again strutting her unhealthy-looking self down the catwalk in an outfit that has less to it than a Kleenex tissue?

Will we see Kate with a carriage? Probably not, but in this day and age, anything can happen. Looking for a Fight? Step Right Up!

And I do mean anything, as I never thought I'd see the day when a videotape of homeless men fighting would be for sale.

Bumfights: A Cause for Concern is a videotape of homeless men beating each other to a pulp or invoking harm unto themselves all for a few bucks, some booze or a little food. These tapes are currently being sold on the Internet for 20 bucks a pop, and reportedly more than a quarter-million have been purchased thus far.

Four men have been arrested on charges varying from conspiracy to solicit assault with deadly force to obstruction of justice.

This whole idea is truly inconceivable. Every time I think we have reached the depths of depravity as an entertainment-seeking society, the world goes me one better.

If these four men really did what they are alleged to have done, they should be forced to perform the very same ruthless and dangerous acts on each other.

Have one of them pull out their own tooth with a pliers. Better yet, I'll pull the tooth out and send the video home to their families for holiday viewing. After all, these guys have both families and homes to go to.

Their defense is that these bums signed consent forms to allow the tapes to be made. They seem to neglect to mention that those that signed the consent were inebriated or under the influence of other substances.

Yep. It's out there. So, never say "never" because the truth is, life isn't always about model behavior.

Heidi Oringer is director of entertainment programming at ABCNEWS Radio.

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