Lil' Kim is out of jail, but is still guilty of serious fashion crimes.
Nick Lachey was clean shaven. His hair looked masculine and sexy. He wore a slim-fitting blazer. But he blew the whole look with his white v-neck T-shirt (and shaved chest?!)
Jennifer Lopez made a chic nod to fall's mod minitrend with her gold, Lurex dress, but the matching head scarf didn't work.
Paris Hilton had great hair, simple jewelry, and an elegant '50s-inspired cocktail dress. Props for Paris! But she wore boots. I get that black ankle booties are all the rage for fall, but it's not fall yet and they ruined an otherwise A+ look.
The VMAs are a bit like high school, and I'm not just referring to the detention-deserving antics.
Rather, there are countless cliques -- or, as I like to call them, "Style Tribes."
So, instead of diving into the trends, let's take a look at the tribes.
The Mod Squad: This group sports shaggy 'dos and skinny suits galore. They include the Raconteurs (the first-ever VMA house band, led by Jack White, rocked the stage and the carpet); the All-American Rejects; Panic! at the Disco; and the Killers (with a dash of '70s Framton-esque kitsch.)
The Glamazons: They're the ones dripping with glitz, glamour, and all that good stuff, and they include Christina Aguilera, Beyonce, Rihanna, Ciara and Jack Black (the unofficial tribe mascot in his gold Lurex suit.)
Ladies in White: Whether sexy or sophisticated, these girls cleaned up the carpet: Fergie, Paris Hilton, Rihanna, Nicole Richie and Beyonce.
Men in Suits: Guys gone GQ, in pinstripes and vests, include Marc Anthony and Diddy, who didn't speak on the red carpet. He actually had another gentleman speaking on his behalf. Forget the zoot suit and say hello to the mute suit. Let's not forget Justin Timberlake, who rocked with a three-piece suit on the carpet before rocking out on stage. Go JT!
Hat Heads: Sometimes you can put a lid on it in a good way. Witness Jay Z, LL Cool J, Pharrell and 50 Cent.
Welcome back to New York, VMAs! I'll definitely be there next year -- in the flesh.