How to Handle 'Sidelines Sports Rage'

Aug. 13, 2005 — -- Sideline sports rage -- out-of-control arguments and violent incidents involving fans -- is making the news again.

It's happening not at professional ball games, but at Little League games where the fans are the parents of the children out on the field. For those parents, playing isn't as important as winning.

These moms and dads have an "unhealthy reliance" on their children's performance out on the field, said Dr. Greg Dale, a sports psychologist and sports ethics professor from Duke University, and author of "The Fulfilling Ride: A Parent's Guide to Helping Athletes Have a Successful Sport Experience."

"Some people perceive sport as the be-all and end-all of one's youth," said Dale. "And when you get into that situation, you're headed to the excess zone."

Parents who have "lost perspective on the importance of the game" are the worst offenders, said Dale.

"They don't have much of a life outside their kid's sports," said Dale. "They'll focus all family vacation around the child's sports activity."

How do you know if you're one of these parents who loses control at sporting events? Dale offered an easy way to tell.

"One good indication is if your spouse won't sit next to you," he said.

Last month in New Bedford, Mass., two mothers got into a fist fight in the stands of a Little League game. One woman's son jumped the playing field fence and helped his mother attack the other woman. The following week, parents angry about a loss threatened the umpire. Officials decided to suspend the season for one week, scheduling mandatory meetings with players and their parents, hoping to prevent more violence.

Many remember perhaps the most egregious story of parental sideline rage: Thomas Junta. In a pick-up game of hockey, Junta beat another father to death in front of their children in 2000. Junta is serving a six-year prison sentence.

But even if parents at your child's sporting events aren't killing anybody, they may be robbing the fun from the experience.

"Parents are much more involved in their kids lives than ever before," Dale said. "They are spending so much more time and money. The investment that they're hoping to get a return on is a great contract or a college scholarship, and the odds are against that."

Parents may be dreaming they have the next Tiger Woods, but they need to face reality. Fewer than 2 percent of high school athletes will ever receive a college athletic scholarship and one in 13,000 high school athletes will receive a paycheck from a professional team, according to the National Collegiate Athletic Association.