Single and Wanting Children, Some Men Seek 'Gestational Carriers'

Aug. 3, 2006 — -- A year ago, David, a successful and single 51-year-old attorney, was engaged to a woman he described as "what you would want in life: a lawyer, pretty, intelligent and always wearing Chanel outfits."

However, he started to realize that maybe she wasn't the one for him. At the same time, he also felt strongly about something else: He wanted to be a father.

"I realized that I didn't need to get married to have kids," said David, who asked that his last name not be used.

He is among a growing number of single men who, as they near their 40s or even 50s, are determined to have children -- even if they have not yet found their ideal life partner.

After splitting from his fiancée, David considered adoption as an alternative means of having children.

"But it was nearly impossible because I was 50 and single," he said. "Many young women giving up their kids often wanted a married couple to adopt their kid."

So David decided that his best option was to join Growing Generations, one of the largest surrogacy agencies in California. He chose an egg donor, and, in addition, a "gestational carrier" to bear his child. Gestational carriers are women who agree to carry embryos composed of donors' or intended parents' sperm and eggs.

Hard numbers on the trend are hard to come by, but a doctor at one of the world's largest fertility treatment centers said he has seen more men like David in the last several years.

"They come from all walks of life: doctors, lawyers, bankers," said Dr. Richard Scott, a physician at Reproductive Medicine Associates of New Jersey.

The trend may be spurred by a growing number of men and women who choose to be single and no longer feel the pressure to get married, said Stuart Miller, CEO of Growing Generations. Ten to 12 percent of his client base is single, he said. This figure includes both sexes.

"The decision [to have a child] is too important to forego just because someone else is not around," said Jeff Bloch, a 47-year-old freelance media trainer who is now raising two children on his own. He is gay. "I'd rather be a parent by myself.