Funnies: A Windbreaker Shortage

A roundup of the late-night comics.

Late Night

Conan O'Brien: President Bush is planning to attend a two-day NATO summit to discuss strategies for the war in Afghanistan. That's the purpose, yeah. Yeah, President Bush will be giving a speech called, "Strategies: Who's Got One?"

Late Night

Conan O'Brien: President Bush visited Estonia today and he thanked the Estonian president for sending troops to Iraq. That's nice, yeah. Yeah, Bush's exact quote was, "Those two guys are doing a great job."

Jimmy Kimmel Live

Jimmy Kimmel: "The president of Iran today, Mahmoud something-I-can't-pronounce, has written an open letter to the American people. It was released at the U.N. headquarters in New York earlier today. He says the purpose of the letter is to try to communicate directly with us, since President Bush won't acknowledge him.

Iranian President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad, via "translator": America, please help. Iran is all out of windbreakers. This is my last one. The others got ripped playing capture the flag. And I let this chick borrow one at a party. Just make sure they are tan colored and a boys' size 12. Please hook a brother up. Thank you and death to America.

The Tonight Show

Jay Leno: Boy, it's cold out today. Wasn't it? I tell you. … It was so cold, I was shaking like Hillary looking at Barak Obama's poll numbers. That's how cold.