A roundup of the late-night comics.
David Letterman: There are ten Republicans want to be president of the United States. Did you see them? I mean they looked like guys waiting to tee off at a restricted country club.
The Tonight Show
Jay Leno: Well, according to The New York Post, Hillary Clinton used three private jets in a single day in a campaign swing through South Carolina. Three different private jets. And today, she was officially named a Hollywood environmentalist. So there you go right there.
The Colbert Report
Stephen Colbert: Good to have the President back talking tough and looking strong. Jimmy.
(shows video of Bush statement)
President Bush: I recognize that many Democrats saw this bill as an opportunity to make a political statement about their opposition to the war. They've sent their message.
Stephen Colbert: And the President deleted it.
The Tonight Show
Jay Leno: And because of Barack Obama's immense popularity, he's already been given Secret Service protection. It's a whole group already. And poor Joe Biden, did you see what he got? Can of mace and a pen knife. Yeah.
The Late Late Show
Craig Ferguson: President Bush was on "American Idol" last night. I know. He made an appearance. Afterwards the phone lines were jammed with people trying to vote him off. I don't…
Jimmy Kimmel Live
Jimmy Kimmel: Instead of this president, the candidates decided to focus on a president from the past. Count along at home now, let's see how many times the name Ronald Reagan gets mentioned.
(shows video of debate)
Sen. John McCain: Ronald Reagan used to say ...
Rudy Giuliani: ... they looked in Ronald Reagan's eyes ...
Chris Matthews: The house of Ronald Reagan ...
Rudy Giuliani: Ronald Reagan taught us ...
Chris Matthews: What Ronald Reagan stood for.
Rudy Giuliani: ... what we can borrow from Ronald Reagan
Chris Matthews: Mrs. Reagan ... Mrs. Reagan
Mitt Romney: Mrs. Reagan
Sen. Sam Brownback: Mrs. Reagan
Chris Matthews: Mrs. Ronald Reagan
Sen. John McCain: Mrs. Reagan
Rudy Giuliani: Ronald Reagan optimism.
Sen. John McCain: In the tradition of Ronald Reagan.
Jimmy Kimmel: There you go, I think 85.