'20/20' Inquirer -- Is Tipping Out of Control?

Dec. 10, 2004 — -- No, it's not your imagination. These days you are tipping more. There's the waiter and waitress, the parking attendant, the car wash attendant, even the bathroom attendant. Then there's the piano man, the doorman, the bellman. There's room service, the hotel maid, shampoo girl, hair stylist, even the waxer.

And now a growing trend, all those cups -- the not so subtle tip jars -- calling, as if it were the collection plate in church.

Nowhere is the tip jar more prevalent than at Starbucks, the country's largest coffee chain. A tip jar for a cup of coffee that can cost nearly $5? A tip jar for workers who already have what many restaurant employees don't have -- health insurance.

But the mere presence of the tip jar makes a lot of people feel obliged to put something in it.

"I do it, but it's more because I'm almost embarrassed if I don't," said one Starbucks customer who spoke to "20/20."

Why do these tip jars annoy people so much?

"I think because they're right there in their face and also because they seem so impersonal," said Peggy Post, the great-granddaughter-in-law of the original good manners expert, Emily Post, and the author of the new, 17th edition of "Emily Post's Etiquette."

So, what is the proper tip for a 95 cent or $1 cup of coffee?

"One or two quarters seems to be the norm. ... but not everyone tips these jars. It is optional, that's the bottom line," said Post.

The last time "20/20" did a story on the question of tipping was in 1999, when the economy was booming. Back then many people didn't think twice about leaving very large tips. But that's no longer the case. To quote a fundamental principal of classical economics -- that was then, and this is now.

A few waiters and waitresses, who depend on tips to make a living, spoke with "20/20" about the dropoff in gratuities.