WATCH: Olinguito Du Jour [SATIRE]

I AM DELICIOUSPlayElise Roedenbeck/Fusion
WATCH Cute, Cuddly, Delicious: Olinguito [SATIRE]

Olinguito, the cute new mammal discovered in the Andes, is nature's newest little surprise. The small creature, related to the raccoon, looks like a cross between an Ewok and a rat. However, anyone who's ever lived in the Andes can tell you meat is meat.

Using my connections in the Andean cloud forest meat network, we decided to cook up some critter using my favorite Peruvian recipe, lomo saltado. Except the lomo in this case is mountain rat (a.k.a. olinguito).

Bummer alert: this is all satire.

Elise Roedenbeck is a comedian and writer born in Lima, Peru.