As for the youth movement, it barely warranted a stir when Taylor Lautner and Kristen Stewart appeared to present a montage of horror flicks. Stewart was so bland, she made Dame Helen Mirren seem giddy.
Martin and Baldwin were able to riff on a few actors, but that's nothing new, and, at times, they seemed to channel "Laverne and Shirley" more than a modern-day comic duo such as, say, Chelsea and Chewy. And interpretive dance ... it was in there, same as before.
Perhaps the only thing that could have saved it would have been surprising winners. Nope.
The odds-on favorites won: Waltz, Mo'nique, Bridges, Bullock, Bigelow and "Locker."
The Bigelow moment could have been a surprise seeing as she is the first female in history to win the best director Oscar, but Barbra Streisand came out to present the category, and so it seemed a given that when the envelope was opened, Kathryn Bigelow's name would be announced.
Despite trying every which way to shake up the snow globe that surrounds Oscar, inevitably, all settled to the bottom of the dome time and time again.
The lesson here? You can't fight gravity, even in Hollywood.