Terry Real Answers Your Sexless-Marriage Questions

It's something most married couples would never confess to -- they no longer have sex.

Once a taboo topic, sexless marriages are getting more attention, in part because so many couples are complaining about the lack of sexual activity in their unions, according to experts.

Family therapist and relationship expert Terry Real appeared on "Good Morning America" today to offer advice on how to have a healthy sex life in a marriage, and answered your questions about how to get your sex life back on track.

VIDEO: Amy and Brad Witt open up about their problems to therapist Terry Real.
Getting Help for a Sexless Marriage

Terry Real's Tips

For half of couples, Real said it's not a sexuality problem but one of forcing yourself to get into the bedroom and become sensual with each other. A lot of couples believe sex is supposed to be spontaneous and romantic, but with the stress of kids and jobs, if they wait for the perfect moment, they'll have a long wait, said Real.

Schedule romantic time once a week. Couples are often reluctant to plan a time for intimacy, no matter how practical it is. Set aside time for a sensual date night after the kids go to sleep.

Act like lovers before you enter the bedroom. Couples should keep some sexual energy flowing during the day by flirting, breathing into your husband or wife's ear, or talking dirty to keep the eroticism going.

Resist the temptation to complain and nag. The sex-starved partner has to keep it positive, to say things like "I miss you," to talk about feeling hurt or inadequate. Don't get angry. Be vulnerable. Say that you both deserve to have a good sex life. Research makes it clear that sex is part of a couple's feeling close to each other, their bonding. Physiologically, it's good for you. It's a critical aspect to your relationship. If you think you can be sexless and have a good relationship, think again. You can't say, "I don't miss having a sex life, so it's no problem." It's a terribly important part of your marriage. If one person is unhappy, both should be unhappy. Don't just let it go.

Investigate the medical component. There may be a hormonal or medication issue that's resulted in a loss of sex drive. If you really do have a sexual dysfunction problem -- premature ejaculation, difficulty having an orgasm -- try some self-help remedies first. Go to the bookstore. If that doesn't work, you can see a licensed sex therapist.

You Asked, We Answered

Note: Some questions have been slightly edited for clarity and to ensure anonymity for the submitter.

Debbie from Florida asked:

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