Holidays Are Not Always Happy

Dec. 27, 2007— -- 'Tis the season to be jolly … and many of us are. With the colorful lights, the cheerful songs, the office parties, the presents, the gatherings with family, the reunions with old friends, the warm fires, the turkey dinners -- how can we help but be jolly?

The trouble is that while most of us are visited by St. Nicholas offering his good tidings, some could also use visits from St. Dymphna.

Never heard of St. Dymphna?

Legend has it that this beautiful Irish princess was pursued by her deranged father and was finally decapitated by him in the Belgian town of Gheel. She's the patron saint of those suffering from mental afflictions.

The holiday season can be a difficult time for people with mood disorders, and this group constitutes a substantial chunk of the population, as about 2 percent of people have a diagnosis of bipolar disorder and 16 percent have major depression at some point in their lives.

One of the difficulties is that some people who are depressed feel inclined to isolate themselves. This may be because of feelings of inadequacy; they may feel that others who see them are judging them negatively, or can see how "bad" they are.

Some people are quick to suspect friends, colleagues and acquaintances of talking about them, making fun of them, or disparaging them.

For others with depression, the desire for social isolation has more to do with feeling they simply do not have the energy that interacting with people requires. They may feel that thinking of what to say requires a level of motivation that they cannot summon.

Yet another difficulty comes from feeling that navigating the many decisions that often accompany the holidays is more than they can handle.

Decisions such as which family members to spend Christmas with, who to buy gifts for, which gifts to buy, whether to send out holiday cards, what to say in them, who to send them to -- all of that requires a level of functioning that some people with depression cannot rise to if they are ill.