The Next Big Thing

July 21, 2008— -- Let's face it: We spend an awful lot of our time waiting. Waiting in bathroom lines. Waiting for that hot Kenneth Cole leather clutch to go on sale at the end of the season. Waiting for a decent Dane Cook movie.

Usually, our patience pays off, the forever unfunny Mr. Cook notwithstanding. But when it comes to some of those promising medical breakthroughs we've been hearing about for the past decade -- uh, birth control for men, anyone? -- we have to wonder: Are we ever gonna see this stuff?

To get some answers, we dished with researchers and other experts to find out what's really going on behind lab doors -- and more important, when we might be able to see some payoff.

Here's the scoop: Our ultimate fantasy is to see him pregnant and squeezing out a pumpkin-headed 10-pounder. But for now, we'll settle for shrugging off the burden of daily Pill popping.

European pharmaceutical companies have already created a chemical that suppresses the hormone responsible for sperm production. When frisky male rats were given the drug, they started shooting blanks; when they stopped nibbling their contraceptive-laced cheese, sperm production came back.

More good news: EU researchers have developed a kind of temporary vasectomy. Instead of snipping the tubes that carry sperm to the penis, a doctor implants a clip that pinches them shut. "Think of it as an IUD for men," says Dr. Manny Alvarez, adjunct professor of obstetrics and gynecology at the New York University School of Medicine.

ETA: Five years for the Male Pill. Scientists are working on a human formula, which will go through trials before being submitted for FDA approval. As for the clip in the U.S., look for it in one year: It's currently in human trials to make sure sperm flow returns after the clip is removed.

Here's the scoop: Scientists have been trying to find a cure for HIV/AIDS for more than 25 years, but it's tricky: "Every time the virus is transmitted, it undergoes small changes," says Patricia Fast, chief medical officer at the International AIDS Vaccine Initiative (IAVI). This means that no two people are infected with exactly the same strain of HIV, making it nearly impossible to create a universal antidote.

But what if we could prevent people from getting infected altogether? That's the goal of more than 30 human trials being conducted around the world by universities, private labs, governments, and the IAVI.

Because it's not safe to use a vaccine made from a killed or weakened strain of HIV (as scientists do with the flu virus), "study participants are injected with a small, basic component of the virus that is present in every strain," Fast says. That way, your body can learn how to fight it off without your getting sick. Then, if you were exposed to the real thing, your immune system would recognize the virus and knock the crap out of it.

ETA: Unclear. Once a vaccine enters late-stage testing, it takes about five years to determine whether it's likely to succeed. After that, more testing is required before it can be licensed for global use.

Here's the scoop: For 10 years, men have been able to pop a pill and go from limp to lusty. Soon -- fingers crossed -- women may be able to get their own boost from a prescription bottle. The German company Boehringer Ingelheim has developed flibanserin, which works by reducing serotonin at the receptor in the brain responsible for sexual desire. "Serotonin suppresses dopamine, which in turn stimulates arousal," says Dr. Anita Clayton, a professor of psychiatry and neurobehavioral sciences at the University of Virginia. "By decreasing serotonin at that receptor, we'll allow dopamine to emerge and do its thing." So you can do your thing.

ETA: Less than two years. Clinical trials for the pill are slated to be completed by the end of this year, which means it could be reviewed by the FDA in late 2009.

Here's the scoop: If you're one of the 21 million Americans with diabetes, checking your blood sugar as often as you check your e-mail can be a pain -- literally. A new contact lens could soon replace the finger prick. The lens -- which will also correct poor vision -- contains a photonic crystal that changes color when the glucose level of your tears increases or decreases. One glance in the mirror and you'll know your blood sugar status. "This technology doesn't draw blood, it doesn't cause pain, and it allows you to continually monitor your glucose level," says Sanford Asher, a chemistry professor at the University of Pittsburgh, who is involved in testing the lens.