Funnies: Toxic Assets and Other Wall St. Treats

March 29, 2009 — -- Here's a roundup of the late-night comics.

Fallon: Michelle Obama's planting a vegetable garden on the White House lawn. You know the economy is bad when the Obamas are afraid of running out of food.

Leno: President Obama met with the CEOs of all the major U.S. banks. A lot of these big-bonus guys. The CEOs looked around the White House and said, "You live in this dump?"

Maher: Treasury Secretary Tim Geither, a.k.a "Little Tim" … he broke out his big plan this week to buy up all those toxic assets that the banks are holding … and if you don't know what a toxic asset is, it's a piece of paper that's worthless now, but could be worth something some day ... the same way Confederate money could be.

Fallon: Former Treasury Secretary Henry Paulson is writing a book about his role in the Bush administration during the economic crisis. It's weird. The book starts on chapter 11.

Leno: Very -- very strange incident at JFK airport in New York City today. An AIG executive going through security had to empty out all his pockets. You know what fell out? Senator Chris Dodd. Yeah.