FUNNIES: President Bush's Alter Ego

April 30, 2006 — -- President Bush and an actor portraying him got big laughs at the White House Correspondents' Association dinner.

President Bush: Members of the White House Correspondents' Association, distinguished guests, ladies and gentlemen.

Steve Bridges [Dubya Double]: Here I am at another one of these dang press dinners. Could be home asleep, little Barney curled up at my feet. But noooo, I gotta pretend I like being here."

Bush: I am absolutely delighted to be here, as is Laura.

Bridges: She's hot. Muy caliente.

President Bush: As you know, I always look forward to these dinners.

Bridges: It's just a bunch of media types, Hollywood liberals, Democrats like Joe Biden. Yeah, all the usual suspects. Speaking of suspects, where's the great white hunter?

President Bush: I am sorry Vice President Cheney couldn't be here tonight.

Bridges: I tell you, you reporters would go nuts if you knew the true story. He was as drunk as a skunk. On one beer. Light beer. Oh, people were ducking and diving for cover. I wish I could have been there. I saw him walking down the hallway the other day. I looked at him and said, "Don't shoot."