Kids Who Scream on Planes and What You Can Do

Dec. 16, 2009 — -- Disclaimer: I am a father, and I love kids. But I have my moments.

Usually these "moments" occur when I'm jammed shoulder-to-shoulder in a long metal cylinder for hours on end as a toddler gives voice to all frustrations. Loudly. Unceasingly. At a volume that can't be drowned out by Metallica on my noise-canceling headphones.

That's when I remember the immortal words of Clarence Darrow (spoken, no doubt, as he sat beside a noisy little tyke aboard a Douglas DC-2): "The first half of our lives is ruined by our parents and the second half by our children." Hmm, a bit extreme, perhaps, however many have sent me notes expressing their willingness to pay one of those dreaded airline fees specifically for child/infant-less flights.

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But enough with the hyperbole: let's talk real-world solutions to the problem of screaming kids: I'm afraid there are only two things that you, the passenger, can do about this:

Now if you're the parent of a wayward child -- that's different. There are a lot of things you can try.

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