Tightrope: Confront fear and turn success into a choice you make

— -- Hello Gladys: I would love to start my own business and I had all intentions of starting my business as a gift to myself for my 50th birthday which is coming soon. However, after a visit to my doctor I learned that I am diabetic. The diagnosis really took the wind out of my sails. Right now I feel good but I can't imagine how long it will last. I suppose you can say I am scared to move forward with a business when I don't know how my health will be in the future. How do I get beyond this fear? — Alysin

When you write "The diagnosis really took the wind out of my sails," keep in mind that statements like this can be self defeating. Set yourself up for success. There are many ways to do this and here are a couple of ideas.

First, set reasonable and seeable goals. In most athletic games — hockey, basketball, tennis, and soccer — players are always able to see the goal that they are trying to reach. Take baby steps toward the life that you want, it will be much easier to reach your ultimate goal without worrying about future possibilities that you can't see at this point.

The next thing to consider is how you look at fear. Fear is one of the greatest obstacles of life. How to get over fear is a question asked by many. You get over fear by facing it straight on. Most fear is of failure. Why start the marathon if you're afraid you are not going to finish? Why start the business if you're afraid it will fail for any reason, be it sickness, or lack of business? Experience shows that if you fear you will most likely fail.

Get beyond fear by acknowledging it, facing it, and talking to yourself about it. Become familiar with the fear that worries you. It might help for you to write a letter to your fear demon so that you can face it clearly and straight ahead. It is through this process that you will neutralize the fear and weaken and even possibly eliminate it. Keep in mind that not all fear is bad fear. The fear that keeps you from jumping off of a bridge is a good fear. The fear that drives us to produce excellent work to avoid losing a client can be a healthy fear for a lot of new entrepreneurs. However, you must learn to recognize the difference between fears that are real versus those that are not.