Tightrope: Take a lesson from GM icon on disagreement
— -- Hi, Gladys, You often say that it's best to have regular staff meetings. I have been doing this. The problem I run into is disagreements. I'm from the old school that says give the boss what he or she wants. I am a senior manager for a large company. I have tried having meetings with our management team, and I am surprised at how often the younger members will disagree with me or challenge my ideas. I have many years of experience and these young managers could learn a thing or two from me. How do I get them to show the proper respect? — M.J.
Reading your e-mail took me back to my youth. I recall one day my grandmother asked me to put a pot of water on the stove to boil for tea. I had just finished washing my hands at the sink. When I started to fill the pot with water grandma quickly told me to make sure I filled the pot with cold water. She added that you always boil water for tea starting with cold water, not hot. Of course it made no sense to me and I started to tell her that once the water started boiling it didn't matter whether it started from hot or cold. Before I could finish my reasoning she abruptly said, "Do as I say and don't sass me, girl!" That of course ended the discussion.
There is a paradox that often takes place both at home and in the workplace. Many of us take great pride in working hard to send our kids to good schools, and we encourage them to be critical thinkers and to question the status quo. And then we reprimand them, get upset or call it disrespect when they behave as we had hoped they would.
Be happy that you are meeting with people who feel comfortable enough to voice their opinions. There's nothing wrong with that as long as it is done in a respectable way.
As the head person, you are responsible for the performance of your entire department and I have no idea how you will continue to pull this off successfully unless you engage the junior managers in the process.
That would include listening to them and giving their ideas and opinions a fair hearing and possibly implementing a few of those ideas.
I once read that Alfred P. Sloan Jr., longtime president and chairman of General Motors, is supposed to have said at a GM executive meeting, "Gentlemen, I take it we are all in agreement on the decision here." Everyone around the table nodded. Mr. Sloan said, "Then, I propose we postpone further discussion of this matter until our next meeting to give ourselves time to develop disagreement and perhaps gain some understanding of what the decision is all about."
I can honestly tell you that many of my successful strategies were adopted from the people working with and for me who have disagreed with my ideas and decisions.
Respect simply means esteem or sense of worth of a person or ideas. That is a two-way street, requiring give and take on both parts.
These are different times from the days when grandma said, "Do as I say." Perhaps if she had been a little more receptive, we both could have learned something about boiling water for tea.
Gladys Edmunds' Entrepreneurial Tightrope column appears Wednesdays. As a single, teen-age mom, Gladys made money doing laundry, cooking dinners for taxi drivers and selling fire extinguishers and Bibles door-to-door. Today, Edmunds, founder of Edmunds Travel Consultants in Pittsburgh, is a private coach/consultant in business development and author of There's No Business Like Your Own Business, published by Viking. See an index of Edmunds' columns. Her website is www.gladysedmunds.com. You can e-mail her at gladys@gladysedmunds.com.
Related Stories
ABC News Live