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EXCERPT: 'Divorce Sucks'

Read an excerpt from Mary Jo Eustace's new book.

ByABC News via logo
September 28, 2009, 2:27 PM

Oct. 20, 2009— -- Mary Jo Eustace's ex-husband Dean McDermott married Tori Spelling 30 days after they divorced. As Eustace tells her story in "Divorce Sucks: What to do when irreconcilable differences, lawyer fees, and your ex's Hollywood wife make you miserable," she also doles out advice about how to move on after a contentious marital breakup.

Read the excerpt below, and then head to the "GMA" Library to find more good reads.

Up until now, you probably thought things couldn't get any worse. But if you're one of the lucky few who get to meet "the other woman" while you're still married or in the process of divorcing, you've now become a member of a worldwide club, a franchise if you will, called "Dumped While Married." Congratulations! Now you get to meet, in the living, breathing flesh, the person your spouse is leaving you for.

Perhaps she is older and less attractive (hardly!) or younger with bigger boobs (duh). Perhaps she is his secretary or trainer or maybe neither. She could easily be the girl next door pursuing her dream of bagging the elusive married man with children and a soon to be discarded ex-wife. Who knows? The permutations for romance are endless. But one thing is for certain, you are now part of a forever triangle—the new wife, your ex, and you. At any rate, this is your chance to get to really know her. Maybe you can get together for lunch, a drink, or a walk in the park. Or perhaps you already have had the pleasure of her company because she's been your best friend since college. Whatever the circumstances, you're about to connect with the woman who will now be your ex-husband's girlfriend.

There's really no better way to pass the time than chatting with the woman who helped destroy your family—especially if she opts to rub it in your face or show you romantic pictures of the two of them on her cell phone. This really is the type of situation where, unless you're highly medicated, the chances for conflict are basically a given. It's sort of like asking Jennifer Aniston and Angelina Jolie to share their favorite Brad Pitt moments; it just isn't natural. But for better or worse, if you have children and your man is intent on hooking up with this new gal, you'll have to face "the other woman." When this occurs, the more control you can have over this situation the better—even if it involves prepared notes, electronic support via e-mail, and closed-circuit cameras. You must be ready on all fronts with appropriate backup to fortify and guide you through this experience, as well as a working knowledge of where the fire exits are at all times, because this baby could blow up at any moment.

The truth is, the repercussions of the meeting can't be known until the fat lady actually sings. I know women who have screamed, yelled, wrestled, and commiserated when they first encounter each other, because this is the perfect opportunity for a major exchange of information. Women do like to talk, especially about men that drive them crazy. This whole UN Summit can be a risky gamble—especially for the guy involved—because the ex-wife may not be a shrew, but rather lovely in fact, with impeccable taste and a keen sense of wit and style.

And what if the other woman is smart and accomplished and has been looking for love and family her whole life and she just happened to stumble upon yours? What if the two of you are similar except one is getting divorced and one is getting married? And what if you feel compelled to tell her about all the warning signs you chose to ignore and she feels compelled to join your spin class and meet for regular coffees? You begin to bond and both wonder aloud why women don't stick together more and have each other's backs. And before you know it, you begin to realize that you've dodged a bullet and that this poor women is in for a ride from hell. So being the person that you are, you let her in on a few more things before setting her up with your accountant's brother—an underwear model turned pediatrician who does volunteer work for Unicef and local nuns. After all, what good is anything if you can't pass on your hard-earned experience to someone who needs it?