Billie Lourd posts moving tribute to late mom Carrie Fisher on 7th anniversary of her death
"Every anniversary brings a different iteration of my grief."
Billie Lourd is remembering her late mom Carrie Fisher seven years after her death.
The "Scream Queens" actress posted a throwback photo of her younger self hanging out on a beach with her mom on Instagram Wednesday.
In the photo, Lourd was holding a red plastic cup in each hand while half her legs were buried in the sand as Fisher sat behind her.
Penning a moving tribute in the caption, Lourd, 31, began, "✨❤️✨It has been 7 years since my mom died (but who's counting?? Me I guess?)."
"Every anniversary brings a different iteration of my grief," she explained.
"Some infuse me with rage, some make me cry all day long, some make me feel dissociated and empty, some make me feel nothing, some make me feel guilty for feeling nothing, and some make me feel all of those things all at once," she added.
Lourd continued, "This year when I woke up I felt grateful - or ✨griefull✨if you will," before adding that the sorrow she experienced provided her with a sense of appreciation that she never had before.
"It makes me soak up every moment of joy as if it were my last," she wrote. "Today I was holding my daughter while she was napping in my arms and my eyes welled up with tears of joy. I laughed at myself then cried more cause I was laughing."
Although her mom is no longer with her, Lourd said she felt her presence in her life "like the warmth of the sun on your skin on a hot summer day."
"The kind of warmth where you unknowingly close your eyes and take a slow breath through your nose and grin," she described. "I miss her every day but the cliche is also true - she is with me every day - she infuses my joyful moments with even more joy."
In the caption, she said she told her son that his late grandmother "lives in the stars."
"And she damn sure makes my life sparkle," the actress affirmed. "Sending my love to all my griefers out there. And hoping everyone can feel a little sparkle of griefull among all the feelings grief inevitably brings. ❤️."
Earlier this year, Fisher, who died at the age of 60 on Dec. 27, 2016, was posthumously honored with a star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame on May 4, which has come to be known as Star Wars Day.
Lourd attended the event to accept the honor on behalf of her mother and delivered a heartfelt speech to celebrate the milestone.
"One of my favorite quotes of hers is, 'Take your broken heart and make it into art,' and she did just that," she said at the time.
"My mom was glitter," she added. "She covered her world in it, both literally and metaphorically. She left a mark of her sparkle on everyone she met."
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