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"Obama will go down as perhaps the worst president in the history of the United States — @RealDonaldtrump," Obama read, quoting the GOP presidential hopeful. “Well, @RealDonaldTrump, at least I will go down as a president,” Obama quipped.
Obama and Kimmel had an exchange about the president getting woken up in the middle of the night, which Obama intimated is an infrequent occurrence.
"Every morning, somebody calls and says, it's your 7 a.m. wake-up call. And it works just like a phone," he said. "There have been maybe three to four instances where you do get a call in the middle of the night — like a typhoon."
"But what I don't do is, I don't tweet about people who've insulted me. I try to sleep so that in the morning I'm actually ready for crises," Obama said, referring to the prolific tweets from Trump, often late at night.
Obama touted Hillary Clinton's capabilities.
"Having worked with her, she is smart as a whip, she works really hard, she cares deeply about working families in this country. And she's not somebody who thinks the job is about flash and sizzle and making speeches - it's about getting policy right and making sure that folks are doing a little bit better," he said, contrasting her with Trump.
"And I think in a time when everybody wants to get 100 percent of what they want right now and if someone doesn’t agree, they’re completely wrong, the brand of politics that Hillary represents — pragmatic, you don’t get everything all at once, you make progress in little pieces — that may not attract as much attention. It's not something that goes into 140 characters. But I think she will be an outstanding president."
Asked about a third term in the White House, Obama said, "Personally for me, if I were able to run for a third term, Michelle would divorce me. So it's useful that I don't have that choice to make."
So does he wish he had the chance to face Trump on the ballot?
"Hillary's doing just fine. I am enjoying campaigning on her behalf, and also for Senate and House candidates," Obama said. "We joke about Trump, but I do think part of reason you've seen Michelle passionate in this election, part of the reason we get involved is not just because Hillary's going to be a great president, but it's also because there's something different about the way Trump has operated in the political sphere. I ran against [John] McCain, against [Mitt] Romney. I thought I could do a better job, but they’re both honorable men. And if they won, I wouldn't worry about generally the course of the country."
"But what we haven't seen before is somebody questioning integrity of elections and the will of the people, a politics based on putting down, in very explicit terms, Muslim Americans who are patriots or describing women on a 1 to 10 score," he continued. "Regardless of what your political preferences are, there is a certain responsibility and expectation in terms of how you behave."
Obama dished about actor Bill Murray's visit to the White House last week.
"He came into the Oval Office in a Cubs shirt, and I don't usually allow that. First of all, most people come in a shirt and tie. I get no tie, but don't rub it in with a Cubs jersey," Obama said.
Obama said Murray agreed to do a social media skit about signing up for health care.
"So we thought of a little skit, decided we were going to putt on the carpet, and somebody grabbed a glass, and he won repeatedly," Obama said. "The glass was rigged. Then he's giving me tips about putting. Seriously, he's all, 'I think your right hand's a little too firm.' He took money from me. I paid him $5. Basically the whole visit was a disaster."
Kimmel asked Obama if it was his money.
"No, I asked somebody," Obama said.