Bottom 10: Notre Dame settles down

— -- The Bottom 10 inspirational thought of the week:

In a lifetime made of memories

I believe in destiny

Every moment returns again in time
When I've got the future on my mind
Know that you'll be the only one

Meet me halfway
Across the sky
Out where the world belongs
To only you and I

-- "Meet Me Halfway" by Kenny Loggins from "Over The Top"

The 2016 college football season is trucking through its halfway point. The nation's best handful of teams are beginning to separate themselves from the pack. Here at Bottom 10 headquarters, located in the attic above the octagon where Kirk Herbstreit spars with his Twitter followers, we don't care for such neat, clean breakaways. We like messy. We prefer to hit the midway portion of the calendar face-first, like Tim Tebow into an outfield wall.

In our world, teams don't separate and depart upward and away like a rocket stage. They drop off the bottom like a discarded booster, doomed to either burn up during re-entry or sink to the bottom of the sea. To most football fans, by mid-October those teams are already doomed to be forgotten. To us, they shall never be forgotten. We shall continue to watch them and admire them, even when others become incredulous and believe they are entirely too awful to be worth our time. These teams are like a movie about a truck-driving deadbeat dad who seeks redemption through arm wrestling.

With apologies to Lincoln Hawk and Steve Harvey, here's this week's Bottom 10.

1. FA(not I)U?(1-6)

These Owls are firmly nested on a branch of a tree that overlooks Heartbreak Ridge. On Saturday, they lost to Bottom 10 Waiting List member Marshall 27-21 after surrendering a touchdown pass with less than two minutes remaining. That's their fourth straight loss by six points or fewer. All but one of those losses came at the hands -- more accurately the talons, paws and hooves -- of current and/or former members of this year's Bottom 10. The countdown is on for next month's Pillow Fight of the Century (PFOC!) against ...

2. Rice (0-6)

3. Kansas Nayhawks?(1-5)

4. I-Ow!-A State?(1-6)

5. Notre Dame ... again?(2-5)

6. UMess?(1-6)

7. Bowling Green (1-6)

8. Buffalo Bulls not Bills?(1-5)

9. In a Rut-gers?(2-5)

Look on the bright side, Scarlet Knights, you'll still be uber-relevant when the postseason arrives. The College Football Playoff selection committee loves to talk about the importance of the common opponent component (say that 10 times fast, Condoleezza). When their meetings begin in a few weeks and they throw Washington, Ohio State and Michigan up on their computer screens, they'll have to have the "Who beat Rutgers worse, and what does that mean?" debate.

10. Pur-don't?(3-3)

If you had the Boilermakers in your office's Who Will Fire Their Coach First To Get The Inside Track On Les Miles? pool, then congratulations. Also, I need to come to work at your office because your pools are awesome.

Waiting list: UTEP (1-5), My Hammy of Ohio?(1-6), NI-Whew?(1-6),? Fres-No State (1-6), Georgia State Not Southern (1-5), getting smacked in the face by a ref, failure to expand.