Gulbis not feeling the 'Happy Slam'

— -- We're all interested in being better, happier, more successful people, right? So we're all into "life lessons" -- or at least you'd think we were, given the shelf space dedicated to the subject in bookstores. (Some of you still remember what those are, right?) So let's see what life lessons we gleaned from the first round of play at the Australian Open.

Make hay while the sun shines

Two-time Australian Open champion and former No. 1 Victoria Azarenka found herself at loggerheads in the draw with Sloane Stephens for the third consecutive year. This time, they met in the first round because neither was seeded: Stephens because she has been in a slump; Azarenka because she's been out a long time, injured.

Now it looks more and more like Stephens missed a great opportunity back in 2013, when she upset Serena Williams in the fourth round in Melbourne and went on to meet Azarenka in a marquee semifinal. It turned out to be a high point in Stephens' career, and things now are going from bad to worse. The other day she took just five games off Azarenka, who hadn't won a WTA match since mid-September of 2014.

Others won't respect you if you don't respect yourself

When Federer was asked about having once been described in print as a "religious experience," he got a good laugh when he replied, "Just a slight exaggeration." But he went on in a more serious vein.

"So I've been through this entire phase where I got so many compliments, you just thought, 'Wow, this is the best feeling in the world.' But very quickly you get the feeling as well that not everything's so great sometimes when you don't play very well. I've been on both sides. That's why I have no problem accepting criticism, but clearly some unbelievable pieces have been written about me, about tennis, about other players. It's interesting to read them."

It's only the "Happy Slam" until it's not

Ernests Gulbis is a popular guy and, usually, a fan favorite thanks to his unfiltered commentary and roguish charm. But he learned the hard way that even those assets won't get you far if you happen to be playing an Aussie in Melbourne -- especially one with roots in the immigrant community.

The fans during No. 11 seed Gublis' first-round clash with 18-year-old Thanasi Kokkanikis, who is of Greek ancestry, were so vocal and -- enthusiastic -- that, as early as the first set, Gulbis' nose got out of joint. He demanded that they "show a little respect."

By the time the match matured into a bitter struggle, Gulbis was demanding that the fans "shut up." You can imagine how that went over. As Kokkanikis chugged down the home stretch, one rabid fan not far from the court was heard F-bombing Gulbis at every opportunity. Kokkinakis upset a rattled Gulbis in four tough sets and afterward celebrated with a head stand. Kokkinakis will next face fellow Aussie Sam Groth.

If you want to succeed, be prepared to leave it all out there

Christina McHale of the U.S. was locked in a grueling 3-hour, 9-minute match with France's Stephanie Foretz. The tussle was interrupted at 4-all in the third, when McHale retreated to the backstop and vomited. But she went on to win the match and later told reporters that she didn't mind getting sick, but "I was embarrassed it took so long to clean it up. But I did feel much better after I let it out." In a tweet following the match, McHale apologized to her followers for the "overshare" on court.

What goes around comes around: Speaking of oversharing, after his first-round win, Rafael Nadal revealed that his markedly shorter "party" shorts made him feel more comfortable, more "fresh." This from the man who set forth to conquer tennis (successfully, we might add) wearing something his Spanish compatriots dubbed "piratas," but which were better known in the U.S. as "clamdiggers" or "pedal-pushers" or that metrosexual spin on ladies' capris, "manpris." Nadal is merely the tip of the marketing spear on this one; pretty soon we'll be back to the halcyon 1980s when, as Andy Murray has observed, the tight, brief shorts of Bjorn Borg, John McEnroe left little to the imagination.

Don't think of it as a crisis, think of it as an opportunity

It seems that getting suspended for a doping violation can do wonders for your game. Look at Marin Cilic, who rebounded from his enforced hiatus in 2013 to win the 2014 US Open as a lowly No. 14 seed. He credited the time he spent during his exile working on his game and fitness with new coach Goran Ivanisevic as the key to his success. Now we have the case of Viktor Troicki, who was suspended for a year ending in mid-2014. Troicki says that the time off allowed him to work intensely to improve his game. He returned to the ATP fold in July with a ranking of No. 847 and wasted no time blasting back into contention.

Preceding the Australian Open, he qualified at Sydney -- and won the title. His nine-match winning streak is the longest by anyone of the new year. He also won his first-round match in Melbourne and is one match removed from a meeting with No. 7 seed Tomas Berdych.

Troicki and Cilic both volubly maintained their innocence (doesn't everyone in their shoes?), so that leaves open at least the possibility that their triumphs constitute a pungent example of a "punishment" that fits the crime.