FUNNIES: Mideast Peace, or Hoffa on a Unicorn?

July 30, 2006 — -- A roundup of the late-night comics.

David Letterman: You know what happened in Washington? President Bush hosted the "American Idol" finalists in the Oval Office. Well sure: There's not really anything else going on.

Jay Leno: And the most ridiculous story of the week: This week, Ann Coulter said that Bill Clinton was gay. I got to admit, he hides it pretty well.

Letterman: Earlier today, former President Bill Clinton campaigned for Sen. Joe Lieberman. Clinton got the crowd so worked up that they had trouble sleeping through the Lieberman speech.

The Tonight Show

Leno: John Kerry said today that if he were president, the current conflict in the Middle East would not be happening. And then his wife Theresa said, "Yes, I know dear, just take out the trash please."

Colbert Report

Stephen Colbert: Things were looking a little grim last week with all those countries pressuring us to call for an immediate cease-fire, but we stayed calm. Sure, we sent over Condi Rice to negotiate, but she's not there for a cease-fire. No, she's there for a quote, "sustainable cease-fire" -- which, considering the Middle East, is like sending her to bring back Jimmy Hoffa on a unicorn.