Anger Causes Chaos for Families

Jan. 29, 2008 — -- What parent or child doesn't lose his or her temper at home from time to time? It's usually just the result of stress and frustration, but in some cases it can become dangerous and rock a family to its core.

Kimberly Williams, a pediatric psychologist at the NYU Child Study Center, says that "anger is something that happens to everybody."

"It's natural," she said. "It's healthy, but it does become a problem when it lasts a long time. When it's pervasive, when it's aggressive, and there's violence, that's extreme and needs some kind of intervention."

CLICK HERE to read Williams' answers to viewers questions about family anger.

Many families struggle with pervasive anger issues, and that's where Jo Frost comes in. Frost is best known as the "Supernanny," the star of an ABC hit reality show. She's also a trained British nanny who's written two best-selling books and seen her share of family conflict. Frost says that there is anger "lingering around in every household," but that sometimes it's extreme and destructive.

"I have had a brick thrown at me, a glass vase thrown where kids are just totally out of control," Frost said.

In one episode of "Supernanny," Frost traveled to Las Vegas to meet a very aggressive 7-year-old named Dylan Shumacher, who was belligerent and foulmouthed. His parents, who worked different shifts during the day, couldn't control his anger.

Frost believed Dylan was actually bored and didn't have an outlet for his energy. She suggested that Dylan's parents put him in a martial arts class where he could channel his anger into physical activity, which turned out to be lifesaving advice for the Shumacher family.

But dealing with out-of-control children isn't always that easy for families like the Weinsteins, whose home in Amherst, Ohio, had become a battleground. The four Weinstein children yelled, hit their parents and destroyed their playroom, wrecking toys and punching holes in the walls.

"When the kids were acting up like that and they were hitting you and yelling at you or swearing or something, it hurts your feelings," said father David Weinstein. "It was like, 'No, you are definitely not going to hit me and you're definitely not going to hit my wife.' And that's what provoked me a lot!"