Working Wounded: How to Survive a Micromanager

May 11, 2007 — -- DEAR WOUNDED: My boss is a micromanager and is driving me totally nuts. How can you deal with someone who is constantly looking over your shoulder?

ANSWER: According to a recent study of the National Association of Home Builders, builders and architects predict that more than 60 percent of custom houses will have dual master bedrooms by 2015. Whether because of snoring, differing schedules or a chemistry experiment gone horribly wrong, even couples that don't get divorced increasingly are going their separate ways at bedtime.

But as more couples go it alone, going solo remains a dangerous strategy for dealing with a micromanaging boss. Instead, you've got to get as intimate as you can with a boss who is constantly looking over your shoulder. Below there are three dos and a don'ts for dealing with a micromanaging boss.

For more, check out Stanly Portny's book "Project Management for Dummies" (Wiley, 2007).

DO examine your performance. The most important place to start with a micromanaging boss is with a long look in the mirror. Yep, as in most things, you need to start by taking off your rose-colored glasses and taking a hard look at yourself.

Let's face it, your micromanager boss may be a jerk who unnecessarily keeps you on a very short leash.

However, there could be a very different reason that your boss is a micromanager. It could be because your past actions require it. Are you a slacker? Sloppy? Do you jump to conclusions? Before you point your finger at him or her, take a hard look at yourself.

DO ask how your boss wants updates. Maybe I fly too much, but to me the world is divided into people who prefer aisles and people who prefer windows. Of course there are a few people out there who prefer the middle seat, but suffice it to say that I don't see this as a real choice, but rather as a cry for help, professional help.

Just as everyone has their seat preferences when flying, your boss has preferences for how he or she likes to receive information -- e-mail, voice mail, project management software, memos, etc. Don't guess. Ask directly how your boss would like updates.

DO overcommunicate. Many of us have a bit of a rebel inside, so when confronted by a micromanager our natural tendency is to withdraw. Whether consciously or unconsciously, this is one way to assert control.

But I'm not a big fan of trying to gain control over someone who signs my paycheck. It's dangerous. That's why I focus on communication -- overcommunication in fact. If bosses want a ton of information, give it to them, with a big smile on your face.

DON'T be defensive or resentful. Remember this isn't a peer, it's your boss. It's your job to adapt, not the other way around.

Follow these tips and you should be able to consummate a much stronger working relationship with your boss, micromanager or not.

"A fool who persists in his folly becomes wise." -- William James

Do try this at work. … Best uses of your time:

• Attempting different things that hardly anyone else is doing
• Utilizing books to educate yourself
• Developing intellectual property
• Meditating and exercising
• Laughing and being playful

From: "Real Success Without a Real Job" by Ernie Selinski (10 Speed, 2006)

Bob Rosner is a best-selling author, speaker and internationally syndicated columnist. He'd love to hear your thoughts on this topic, especially if you have better ideas than he does. His books include "The Boss's Survival Guide" and "Gray Matters: The Workplace Survival Guide." Send your questions or comments to him via: bob@workingwounded.com.

ABCNEWS.com publishes a new Working Wounded column every Friday.This work is the opinion of the columnist and in no way reflects the opinion of ABC News.