Husbands, Your Wives Want You to Read This

Dr. Scott Haltzman admits that his 17-year marriage has its flaws (as does everyone's, he says), but you can still learn plenty from him. Haltzman, author of "The Secrets of Happily Married Men: Eight Ways to Win Your Wife's Heart Forever," shared his tips on "Good Morning America." In case you're wondering, Haltzman does follow his own advice.

Eight Ways to Win Your Wife's Heart Forever

Make Marriage Your Job: Treat your marriage like it's your top priority. Use the problem-solving skills you learn at work on your marriage. If there's a problem in the marriage, react the way you would if you had a problem at work: Break it up into small doable tasks, hatch a strategy and stick to it.

Know Your Wife: Most men assume they know their spouse, but don't know who she really is. Observe her when she's with her friends or cheering on the sidelines at a soccer game. Take notes: What does she like? Dislike? And use that information to convey to her that you truly know her.

Be Home Now: Most men are not hardwired to spent a lot of time at home -- harkening back to the hunter-gatherer days. They also struggle to let go of their bachelor ways. When they get married, they don't know the rules -- one of which is: Your wife expects you to come home. Also many men are away from home because they're working very hard to support the family -- something they consider a labor of love, but their wife considers a problem.

Expect Conflict, Deal With It: Fights are inevitable. Even happy couples fight. Trouble is, a man's natural inclination is to dig in and fight till the death. But a guy can lessen the blow if he learns to fight better. Don't get defensive. Soften your tone. Don't point fingers.

Learn to Listen: Simple, but powerful. All those women out there who complain their men don't listen may be right: Listening does not come naturally to men. The good news is: It's a skill that can be learned. Men can make small changes and in turn make their wives feel like they're being heard. First, turn off the TV. Second, make eye contact with her. And third, don't pace; stand still.

Aim to Please: All those networking skills men learn at work -- use them at home. Treat your wife at least as well as you would your boss, your co-worker or your most important client. Rule of thumb: All those things you did for her while you were courting, you should still be doing them now that you're married.

Understand the Truth About Sex: The simple, unavoidable fact is that men and women are different, and what they need in the bedroom is different, too. The old stereotypes -- that women need more intimacy, a slow build -- may or may not be true. But what *is* true is men and women need to acknowledge that they're different and be sensitive to where the other is coming from.

Introduce Yourself: This should be the last step -- once you're in your wife's good graces, reintroduce yourself to her. Let her know who you are, what you care about and what you want.