The Worst of 'OctoMom: The Incredible Unseen Footage'

Lowlights from the documentary about Nadya Suleman's brood that aired this week.

Aug. 22, 2009 — -- FOX's two-hour-OctoMom documentary aired earlier this week. My first instinct was to hide under the covers, shaking uncontrollably, and wait for it to be over, but I knew I had to watch for your sake. So I took out my earplugs, stripped off the sheets, and ventured out in front of my TV again.

Of course it was as bad, maybe worse, than I thought. Below, the choicest moments from the two-hour crapfest "OctoMom: The Incredible Unseen Footage."

While filming the epic birth of Nadya Suleman's kids, a hospital worker asked the camera person to step out of the way. The camera person said, "I'm calm and I'm normal ... There's no reason to start something ... I've already cleared this with everybody and I don't know why you are in my face!" Then she told the staffer, "You're completely immature and we'll talk about it later."

Nadya voiced what we all knew to be true when she said, "I screwed myself, I screwed up my life, I screwed up my kids' lives. ... What was I thinking? ... What the heck am I going to do? I have to put on this strong face, and I have to pretend like I don't regret it. ... I cannot regret it now because I have them and they are here but what was I thinking?"

OctoMom dished on her rival Kate Gosselin. She said, "I feel like it's cheating [to get a tummy-tuck]. It's her choice. If she has enough money to fix herself, let her. I have a better shape, though. I'm sorry, no offense to her. I'm not as attention-seeking."

Then she talks about sex saying, " ... The more kids I have, the less I remember what it was like."

The horror!

Did you catch the OctoMom doc? Post your comments in the section below.