'We're moms' viral video shows reality of parenting little kids during holidays

Renee Reina's viral video drew comments from hundreds of moms, as well as dads.

December 20, 2023, 5:25 PM

One mom is using the viral "we're moms" trend to share what it's really like to be a parent, especially to younger kids, during the holidays.

"We're moms. We create Christmas cheer for the entire family, but nobody creates it for us," Renee Reina, the mom of a 5-year-old son, says in a TikTok video that went viral this month.

"We're moms," Reina says in another clip. "We're gonna see everyone we know over the holiday season, but not have one single meaningful conversation."

Reina, host of "The Mom Room" podcast, said she was inspired to create the video after seeing other moms of young kids try to get through this holiday season. Watching them made her reflect on how even more difficult the holidays were during the first four years of her son's life.

"I remember holidays and family get-togethers, when he was younger, how difficult it was, and almost not enjoyable," Reina told "Good Morning America." "That's such a disconnect because you think you're excited for the holidays, and then they actually arrive and you're like, 'Wait a minute.'"

Reina said she vividly remembers family gatherings where she would be upstairs giving her son a bath and putting him to bed while listening to the rest of her family continuing to have fun, a memory she also captures in her TikTok video.

"We're moms," she says in the video. "We can't wait to give our kids a bath and put them to bed while everyone else is downstairs having a great time."

PHOTO: Renee Reina shared a video on TikTok describing what it's like to be a mom during the holiday season.
Renee Reina shared a video on TikTok describing what it's like to be a mom during the holiday season.
@thereneereina/TikTok

Reina's video drew hundreds of comments, including many from other moms, as well as some dads, adding in their own experiences.

"We're moms. We buy and wrap our own presents so our kids don't ask why there's nothing there for us," wrote one commenter, with another adding, "We're moms. Our stockings are always empty."

"We're moms," wrote another commenter. "We make sure everyone else is ready and presentable, but we're still in the shower when the guests arrive."

Reina said she was not surprised that her video gained so much attention. She said she knew it would resonate with other parents feeling alone and overwhelmed through another holiday season.

"People write their comments because it is so relatable, but it's not necessarily something that people verbalize and say out loud," Reina said. "It's something that we're all experiencing though, so when you are scrolling TikTok and you see something like that come up, you instantly feel inclined to leave a comment and just kind of say, 'Yeah, I experienced this too.'"

PHOTO: Renee Reina shared a video on TikTok describing what it's like to be a mom during the holiday season.
Renee Reina shared a video on TikTok describing what it's like to be a mom during the holiday season.
@thereneereina/TikTok

Reina added that she also knows from experience that mothering young kids can feel robotic at times, so sometimes it takes someone else to make you realize the tension or stress you're feeling is not self-induced.

"You're just going through the motions and you're experiencing things, like, 'Why didn't I have fun at the holiday dinner?' But you're not actually sitting and thinking, 'Oh, it's because I felt left out having to do bath time and bedtime,'" she said. "So, when someone brings it to your attention, like, this is why holidays are not the same as they used to be, you're like, 'Oh yeah, that's right.'"

Reina's advice for the moms -- and dads too -- going through the early years of parenting is to know that there is a light at the end of the tunnel.

She said she feels a difference even this year with her son being 5 years old.

"Everything is temporary," Reina said. "You might have a few years where the holidays look totally different and you feel left out, but it'll come back."

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