Voices of Alzheimer's Caregivers: Part Three

June 25, 2009— -- This is part three of the transcript from a special roundtable discussion featuring Alzheimer's caregivers. In this section, the participants -- Alice, Maureen, Phyllis, and Joe -- talk about the challenges of daily living for a loved one with Alzheimer's, such as bathing and dressing.

PHYLLIS: I love playing med spy. Getting this person out of the room and going through the daily pill counter. And it's the only way we know whether or not they're taking their meds. ...We're sitting back hoping that they're taking their meds daily. They still live independently right now.

ALICE: See, my husband can't live independently. He couldn't do that. He couldn't even make himself a cup of tea.

PHYLLIS: That's our fear right now that it's coming close -- that living independently will be very short, at this point. So, trying to check in on them to confirm: Did they take their meds? Did they eat dinner? Did they do this? Did they do that? You know, not making it sound like we're mothering -- telling them what to do -- but trying to help guide them that little bit. But it's very difficult, right now, because we have no assurity that these things are happening.

JOE: The other problem I have is she won't take her medication.

MAUREEN: She won't take it?

JOE: She tries not to take it and I keep pursuing her to take it. She'll lie that she took it. Those are the two problems that I got -- the water, the showering and the medication…Other than that, I can handle it pretty well.

MAUREEN: The clothing? Getting dressed?

JOE: Oh, I lay out her clothes for her every day. One thing I learned is that she doesn't like to make decisions.

MAUREEN: That's how my mother is, too.

JOE: I lay out her clothes for her each day. If I didn't do that she would never dress up.

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JOE: [It's difficult] to get her to take a shower. She becomes another person.