Texas Dad Writes He Cannot Afford His Stay-at-Home Wife
Steve Nelms calculated the costs of his wife's work down to the dollar.
— -- It’s often portrayed humorously in TV sitcoms – most recently ABC’s “Modern Family” – that moms are not always appreciated for what they do, but one Texas man calculated his wife's worth down to the dollar.
Steve Nelms, of Plano, Texas, figured out that he “quite literally” cannot afford for his wife, Glory, to be a stay-at-home mom to their 2-year-old son, Ezra.
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“Now, I don’t at all mean to offend anyone with this post. I just have to say that for me personally, I can’t afford it,” Nelms wrote in a March 20 post on his blog, "We Are Glory."
“I’d like to explain exactly what I mean by that so that no one thinks I’m in any way devaluing Stay-At-Home Moms," he continued.
Nelms went on to itemize every job his wife performs, from child care ($36,660) to cleaning ($5,200) to cooking ($12,480). The total comes out to $73,690 per year, according to Nelms’ calculations.
"In short, I can’t afford for my wife to stay at home. And I’ve tragically failed to show my wife the appreciation that she deserves. She loves me, loves our son, and loves our family, so obviously she isn’t doing any of those things for a paycheck or even for recognition," Nelms wrote. "But it certainly doesn’t hurt to know that as a Stay-At-Home Mom her appraised salary is nearly double my actual income. So in a very weird way, this is my way of saying how much I value my wife as the mother of my child and the one who always has my back no matter what. You are more precious than rubies. And I can’t afford you."
Nelms says that Glory had been employed since the age of 14, always earning a paycheck outside of the home.
"It was hard to stay at home for a reason. It wasn't necessarily the workload," Glory told ABC News. "It was everything that came with losing that paycheck, losing that job, losing the connection with other people in the world."
Nelms said his original intent for the post was to "show appreciation" for Glory.
"It was never intended to say one way of doing it was right or wrong. It was simply a reflection of how our family dynamic works," he told ABC News. "It was meant to show my wife appreciation."
Nelms’ post drew over 1,000 comments, ranging from support, to those who called out Nelms for calculating his wife’s contributions and who said staying at home is a “choice” for mothers.
“I’d love for my nagging husband to read this,” wrote one commenter. “All he does is gripe for me to get a job and expect me to somehow clean/feed/care for my children all at the same time.”
“It’s supposed to be a partnership with each contributing equally but obviously with their own unique skills, not a place of employment with one side of the accounting left blank,” argued another commenter.
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